Recently, someone shared this website with me.
Check it out and read the posts if you have time, but if you don’t, in short, it’s about two friends who decided to embark on this project where they dated each other for 40 days, with certain rules attached. They blog about it every day- the things that they did and how they felt about each other.
The certain someone, was a stranger. Perhaps it was inspiration, or perhaps we were just feeling adventurous, but eventually we decided to do another project of our own, that involved forty days of e-mails to each other- He would send one before his day started, and he would talk about what he did the previous day; while I would send one when my day ended (mid-night) to talk about what happened that day. We also both got to ask each other questions about each other- personal or otherwise. Before we started telling each other about our days, we would answer the question first.
We are at Day 5 now.
One of the days, the question posed to me was about what kind of person I am, and if I conduct myself differently in front of different groups of people. When I saw the question, I knew immediately that I can never give him a definite answer because I’m so unsure of my identity and self that I didn’t even know how to approach the question.
I would think that I can conduct myself better with strangers like yourself because I feel extremely conscious and unconfident around people that sometimes it reaches to a point of awkwardness. It takes alot of time and experiences together before I recognize that if someone is a keeper or not- but often, people just don’t stick around that long.”
That was probably the surest thing that I could say to him about myself.
I guess sometimes I just get so sick and tired of people around me, and I just wish that I could strip everybody of any pre-notion that they might have of me. I just wish to come before people- bare and empty, so that they can know me for who I really am inside- the riot of thoughts that take place within to the strongest part of my soul that keeps me sane, instead of what I can do with my two hands or what I seem to have the flair for. And I guess that’s what this whole e-mailing business has allowed for, and I can’t be any happier being so truthful and honest to somebody everyday.
We all need to reflect everyday. But really, what does it mean to reflect? Is it to look at your to-do list and see how many ticks there were, how much money you managed to secure yourself, the number of people you saw today or all the events that you attended for the day? Reflection goes beyond the physical deeds- It’s really asking yourself how you were a better person (by your standards) as compared to who you were yesterday and if not what you should do about it and then do it. I think this project has placed me in a position where everyday I think through every action and emotion I felt for the day and I guess sometimes we just need that someone to force us onto that chair and reflect, otherwise, life would probably pass in a blur and nothing would ever hold much significance.
So perhaps, grab a stranger and see where that takes you?- You never know the adventure you are in for 😉